This is my very first blog post for our new ICF WA Branch Blog and I am feeling a mix of excitement and apprehension.
Being offered this opportunity is a privilege. I invite yoiu to share your comments, questions, suggestions, ideas, and to contribute to growing this blog and our virtual coaching community.
So where do I begin? I decided to share my vision, my overarching goal, which is
"Abundance". You'll notice that I said 'goal', as it is something to which I continue to strive
Where does one start? With a question.
How do I choose to live my life?
Abundantly. How much does my mindset influence what I do, the decisions I make (big and small) and how I show up as a coach, colleague, leader, facilitator, partner, daughter, friend, aunt, steward, volunteer? Hugely.
Of course the opposite to Abundance is Scarcity. In the speech Eric Kimani delivered in 2006 to a group of Bankers, he said:
What is an abundance mentality - this is a deep belief that there is enough for all - enough work, enough jobs, enough resources. It is living with a favour-minded attitide. One can define it also as optimism. Seeing the glass half full rather than half empty. Thinking big and expecting big! The barriers are in our minds and we will not go beyond the barriers in our minds.
By contrast the scarcity mentality is a belief that your success will imply someone else's failure; that there are scarce resources and if you get them you must deny someone else; that there is scarcity of jobs; that the cake is not enough and I must grab my share. ("The Abundance vs the Scarcity Mentality in Professional Development and Growth http://rotarynairobi.org/clubnewsdetail.asp?newsid=83)
As a coach I am reminded constantly through conversations with my clients of the power of our mindset. When a client is stuck in a 'mindset of scarcity' this limits their choices and often prevents them from moving forward. My role as coach is to generously and respectfully challenge them, through questioning and feedback. On the other hand, being fully present as a coach and holding the space for a client in an 'abundance mindset' supports them to discover new possibilities, generate options and celebrate their 'Ah Ha' moments!
When working with leaders and emerging leaders we often discuss Steven J Covey's
"The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People". His fourth habit "THINK WIN WIN " always generates rich and passionate dialogue between participants and also serves to remind me of my own goal,
Abundance:
Think Win-Win isn't about being nice, nor is it a quick-fix technique. It is a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration. Most of us learn to base our self-worth on comparisons and competition.We think about succeeding in terms of someone else's failing - that is, if I win, you lose; or if you win, I lose. Life becomes a zero-sum game. There is only so much pie to go around, and if you get a big piece, there is less for me; it's not fair, and I'm going to make sure you don't get any more. We all play the game, but how much fun is it really?
Win-win sees life as a cooperative arena, not a competitive one. Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all human interactions. Win-win means agreement or solutions are mutually beneficial and satisfying. We both get to eat the pie and it tastes pretty darn good!
A person or organisation that approaches conflicts with a win-win attitude possesses three vital character traits:
Integrity: sticking with your true feelings, values and commitments
Maturity: expressing your ideas and feelings with courage and consideration for the ideas and feelings of others
Abundance Mentality: believing there is plenty for everyone
Many people think in terms of either / or: either you're nice or you're tough. Win-win requires that you be both. It is a balancing act between courage and consideration. To go for win-win, you not only have to be empathic, but you also have to be confident. You not only have to be considerate and sensitive, you also have to be brave. To do that - to achieve that balance between courage and consideration - is the essence of real maturity and is fundamental to win-win. (www.stephencovey.com/7habits-habit4.php)
How fortunate I am as a facilitator and coach to partner and learn with others everyday and be rewarded for it!
But there are times I find myself moving towards a scarcity mindset, feeling less than resourceful, in a mood of anxiety about something. When I notice my view of the world narrowing and my energy waning it's time for me to take a step back and apart from some self-coaching the following quotations usually help to ground me:
"All that we are is a result of what we have thought" Buddha
"The universe operates through dynamic exchange ... giving and receiving are different aspects of the flow of energy in the universe and in our willingness to give that which we seek, we keep the abundance of the universe circulating in our lives." Deeprak Chopra
Before I sign off I want to share an article with you by Hester L Wyhlidal of SALT in Austria:
http://www.salt-pro.com/assets/pdf/abundance.pdf
Hester has captured the essence of 'Abundance versus Scarcity' with her storytelling approach, theory and personal reflections. She certainly walks her talk, giving me permission to use article with her delightful "the pumpkin seed has spread" analogy and her 'sign off statement', reminding me of the 2001 movie
Pay it Forward.
"I need to pass on the gift given to me once upon a long time ago as I am convinced there is a place for it, especially now. THINK ABUNDANTLY!" Hester L Wyhlidal.
Warm Regards
Janine.
